School has started. I’m so thrilled. Stomp on your foot, kick you in the crotch, spit on your neck thrilled. You might recall that this is not where I thought I’d be this year. I fully believe the Universe has a script for me, but I have not yet received it, and I’m mad about … More 71 days ’til Christmas vacation
I am at work, and I am logged into Blogger. This was impossible just a few days ago, but for some reason I managed access. I’m not questioning my good fortune. I think maybe the Universe opened up the portal for me so I could say this: if you haven’t already, go send some peace … More I am at work, and I am logged into Blogger. This w…
The lid on a previously opened carton of Edy*s D*bs is not–I repeat: NOT–tight-fitting. Therefore, flinging open the freezer door to grab and eat said D*bs might create an unsettling motion in the freezer, thereby causing the carton to topple, in which case the lid WILL COME OFF and your precious D*bs will scatter all … More Public Service Announcement
…if Pluto is no longer a planet, what will become of that little mnemonic device we learned in school (hi Joy!) to help us remember the order of the planets? You know–My Very Energetic Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas. What now? My Very Energetic Mother Just Served Us…Nothing?
Shamelessly stolen from Lorem. A is for Age: Thirty-one (at least for the next few weeks) B is for booze of choice: Corona with lime…oh, how I miss it. C is for Career: English teacher D is for Dog: Suzanna E is essential items you use/love everyday: Burt’s Bees lip balm, the Mr. Clean Magic … More Alphabet soup (Meme the Third)
Thanks to Trista for tagging me to do this very cool “mix tape” questionnaire. What songs would you have on your personal “meaningful mix” CD? 1) A favorite political track: Times, They are a-Changin’ by Bob Dylan and Dear Mr. President by Pink. 2) One of those tracks that make you dance on the dance … More Meme, or shameless gesture on Trista’s behalf because she’s wondering where the hell my mix CD is (Meme the First)
My hairdresser called me “Chunky” today, as in, “Hey Chunky, what’s up?” I stabbed him with his own scissors and hid him under the picnic blanket I keep in the hatch of my Matrix.
There is a “Gilmore Girls” promo that’s been running endlessly on the Warner Brothers station that shows Lorelei and Rory hugging. Rory says, “I love you, Mom,” and Lorelei says, “Kid, you have no idea.” I dissolve into tears every time I see it; I had to bite my tongue while I typed that last … More I thought the hormones eventually achieved some sort of balance
Hi. My name is HD, and I have writer’s block. There, I said it. I thought you should know, as I have been promising my version of wit and creativity for, well, the entire summer. No doubt you’ve noticed it just isn’t happening. I find it strange indeed that my creative juices flow more smoothly … More Step 1
First of all, my most sincere apologies for alluding to that horrible song** again in the title of my last post. I don’t know why, but every time I am remotely reminded of it, it lodges itself in my brain where it stays until something else moves into its place. It’s as if I no … More Of small brains and big boobs*
one small corner of the universe 