What’s on your mind?

Why is it that in every news photo published of her, Condi Rice looks like she’s standing knee-deep in the middle of a giant vat of cow shit?

Why is it that every third person asks how you’re doing when you’re pregnant? These people never spoke to me before. Why now?

For those of you who have recently had kids, did you have a baby registry? If so, did people use it? I’m being “showered” this weekend, and only one item has been purchased from the registry (by my aunt, no less). What’s up with that?

Why is it that some people insist on driving for as long as they can in a known turn lane during rush hour, even though they really don’t want to turn, only to put their signal on in the middle of an intersection and then count on someone’s goodwill (or sheer irritation) to let them in the straight lane? More to the point, why are these people allowed to drive at all? Don’t they know they are a) holding up the turn lane traffic and b) posing an accident threat by parking their stupid asses in the middle of the intersection while waiting to squeeze into the traffic they should have been sitting in all along?

And why is it that in every published photo of Rosie O’Donnell, Rosie looks like she’s in heavy labor, about to give birth to something really large, like Star Jones?


3 thoughts on “What’s on your mind?

  1. Every third person? You’re lucky. I was so sick and tired of the phrase, “How are you feeling?” by the end of my pregnancy that I fantasized about responding to people by smacking them and saying, “Pretty good, NOW.” 🙂

    Registries – I imagine you’ll see a flurry of activity over the next couple of days and also get a bunch of things (some duplicates) off the registry that people did not buy FROM the registry, just adding to confusion. Hope for receipts. And don’t lose them. And for god’s sake, don’t cut off the tags and/or wash too many of the clothes until after the baby is born because you never know what size the kid will be.

    End of assvice rant.

  2. I received very few things off of my baby registry. I chalked it up to the fact that most of the people showering me didn’t live near stores that offered the baby registry. In fact at one shower (the largest one I had), I received seven towels and 35 wash cloths, none of which were on my registry. I hope you get lots of great stuff!

  3. um, i have a question… is Kris Kristofferson a real person? It just seems to funny to be real, like Neil McNeil or Robert Bobby. Just wondering!! 🙂
    feeny

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