Disclaimer: I am fully aware that an insemination yesterday couldn’t possibly lead to pregnancy symptoms today. The following is completely normal behavior.
I actually attempted to fix myself a “real” breakfast today. Somehow the Zone bar doesn’t last as long when I’m sitting around reading blogs and watching “Friends” reruns in my yoga pants and an old t-shirt with a bandana tied around my head. I actually fixed a few slices of turkey bacon and scrambled some eggs, but after eating most of the bacon, I gave the rest of the eggs to Suzanna and crumbled the last piece of bacon into the cat’s bowl. It sounded good, but it just didn’t taste quite right, so I ate a bowl of cataloupe and an ice cream sandwich instead. Now I’m eyeing the blue tortilla chips and a bag of those little 100 calorie Chips Ahoy cookies.
All this good eatin’ has make me very pensive. I’m pondering the big questions in life. For instance, what the hell what Jennifer Lopez thinking when she named her remix album “J to tha L-O.” What does that mean? I actually thought yesterday that maybe she’s not really so bad; I watched “Shall We Dance,” and while she’s not really all that great at acting, I wasn’t repulsed by her as I sometimes am. But then the Rhapsody startup page greeted me with a little J-Lo-a-Rama, and that particular title jumped out at me. (There, see, I wasn’t actually listening to J-Lo. You feel better now, don’t you?)
This is where I should probably have a clever denouement, a snappy ending that combines the key elements in the story of my day: J-Lo, ice cream sandwiches, and blogging. But I’m not feeling inspired. I am, however, feeling hungry, and there’s a box of corn muffin mix, a tomato, and some strawberries calling my name.