Overheard recently in my kitchen, NOW WITH ADDITIONAL HILARITY

After offering Mia a bite of cheese omelette, which she politely removed from her mouth after a few chews: Me: Oh honey, you like eggs. [aside] At least you have in the past. Mia: Mommy, it’s not the past anymore. From the dining room, where she had been warily watching me vacuum the kitchen: Mia: … More Overheard recently in my kitchen, NOW WITH ADDITIONAL HILARITY


One of my greatest weaknesses as a human being is that I allow things to accumulate for such ridiculous periods of time that I often never get around to dealing with them at all, because to address them beyond their natural deadline seems foolish to me, and so I continue to ignore them and have bad feelings … More Dodging


Conversation at our table over dinner, Tuesday, March 24, 2009: Mia: I want some letters*! Mommy: You have to eat some chicken first. Mia: I want some letters! Mommy: You can have some letters as soon as you eat some of your chicken. Mia: I want some letters! Mommy: Okay, eat ONE bite of chicken … More Trouble

Bang bang

I am in my fifth day at my new job, and I am already equal parts elated-overjoyed-invigorated and freaked-the-hell-out. It’s too much to explain now, but here are some things for you to consider: for the first time in years I am being listened to at work–by adults; I am legally parking in the same faculty/staff … More Bang bang

Just shoot me

Let me start by saying that this getting up an hour before the kid has been working out pretty well for me, but not so much for my writing habit, which is why I started doing it in the first place. I won’t bore you with reasons why I haven’t been writing, but they are … More Just shoot me

This post brought to you by the letters W, T, and F

So I have this giant bald place, and it was completely and totally a result of the resort emergency alarm, which apparently was “falsely activated.” Do you know what that means, people? Do you? It means that some punk kid (or obnoxiously immature adult, which I’ll get to another time) pulled the fire alarm lever and ran … More This post brought to you by the letters W, T, and F

Please and thank you

Did you ever see that episode of “Friends” where the guys go on a police ride-along with Phoebe’s boyfriend du jour, and Ross gets all “I have a new lease on life” because he thinks someone took a shot at him? And Joey threw himself onto Ross to “shield him from the bullet”? But it was … More Please and thank you

Dear Catherine Newman:

While I am fully aware that thousands of people will read your latest blog entry and have exactly the same reaction I did, I’d like to thank you personally for making me cry actual noticeable tears during my Monday night graduate class. Thank goodness my professor is part bat, or opossum, or something, and likes … More Dear Catherine Newman: